The quote frenzy
by ThePineappleNerd
Summary: In which Spain is deeply traumatized, America learns Mandarin, England is being his badass pirate self, and Nations use quotes of movies/ films/ books before they were cool. Warning: Contains general stupidity


**Disclaimer : I don't own AP Hetalia, nor Star Wars, nor History of the world, nor Cars, nor Stargate, nor TBBT. All rights belong to their owner, and I'm not making any money writing this.- I wish I would though. ( man, what a long disclaimer)**

_**The British Empire**_

It was something Spain would remember his whole life. The traumatic picture of his armada burned to ashes as he lay in the water, England staring down as him. But even more terrifying was what happened next when England spoke :

- From now on, you will remeber... When you strike the Empire...

He paused , adding to the effect, and turned around, his pirate cape suddenly seeming black.

-The Empire strikes back.

Spain could've sworn he heard music in the background. And to this day, he is still unable to watch Star Wars without fainting.

_(Star Wars)_

_**The speech.**_

The Roman Empire was tired of being mocked by the other countries, ever since his fall. So one day he decided to defend himself.

-"We Romans are rich. We've got a lot of gods. We've got a god for everything. The  
only thing we don't have a god for is premature ejaculation but I hear that's coming  
quickly."

He never understood why the whole meeting room burst into laughter

(_History of the world part 1 – 1981)_

_**Intellect**_

It was his first day on this job and he was told he was going to meet someone of the utmost importance. A little nervous, he braced himself and entered the room.

The man was there. Dirty blond hair, blue eyes behind glasses, he seemed completely relaxed. Gulping in fear he introduced himself :

- Hello sir, I am John Smith, British Intelligence.

The man seemed a bit startled but grinned wide.

-Nice to meetch'a. Alfred F. Jones, average intelligence.

(_Cars 2)_

_**The perks of invisibilty.**_

Canada was done being depressed over such a small thing. Besides he had found the day before that if he talked loud enough people could hear him even if they didn't see him. He was currently testing this theory with Japan :

_Canada : -_I can sneak around all I want, totally undetected. I give us the element of surprise. The bottom line is, I can do more for this planet invisible than I ever could as my own sweet salient self.

_Japan : -_ I assume I am staring at you stoically.  
_Canada _: Not buying it, eh?

_Japan :_ No. You are most transparent, Canadia-san.

_Canada:_It's Canada ! Oh, I get it... Good one. 

_Japan : _I can see right through you. 

Canada sweatdropped.

_Canada :_ Don't push it. 

_(Stargate Sg1, discussion originally between Jack O'Neill and Teal'c set somtime during the 10th season)_

_**The new language.**_

England was doing some needlework at America's house, when he was greeted by an unbelievable sight. America was speaking to himself in chinese while reading about 20 books. A bit afraid for his former colony's health he got up and went to see what was going on.

-What are you doing ?

-What does it look like I'm doing ? The other snapped.

England backed up a bit and raised his hands in front of him.

America sighed.

-Sorry dude. It's just... My boss snapped at me for doing something stupide – it was totally awesome and not stupid at all by the way- and as a punishement, he forced me to learn Mandarin. It totally sucks, though..

-Well, tough on you lad...

A few minutes later England started to make his way towards the fridge. Opening the fridge, he spoke :

- You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin. 

-Huh ? Why? 

-Because once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

-_On the other side of the world, China suddenly shivered _-

Before America could answer with an awesome come back England suddenly asked him another question.

-Are you conducting some sort of scientific experiment?

-Hey, come one, that salsa's still good !

_( The part with the billion people to annoy comes directly from a TBBT episode where Sheldon decides to learn Mandarin. The part with the Salsa comes from the episode in Stargate Sg1 where O'Neill is in his teenage form. )_

_( Yes I know it isn't really his teenage form, but hey, not too many spoilers, hey ^^)_

**Here you go. Hope you enjoyed~ **

**I'm sorry for any grammatical / spelling mistake for English is not my first language ( French is) and I couldn't find a Beta for this fic. **

**Feedback and suggestions are more than welcome. Do you think I should continue this ? **

**Thanks for reading !**


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